*j bird.

A mess. An utter mess of 50 pounds of pure, quivering musculature, poised to collapse in fear at the first balloon pop, pillow tilt, or floor change. Velvet soft around the ears, but coarser down the back and tail. Smelly beyond all measure. Strong, but stupid. Prone to sneezing fits and bouts of drool. Owner of the world's biggest smile, brightest eyes, and most dumbfounded reactions to familiar events.

Has no idea what his name is, what part of the hose the water comes out of, or whether, when I leave, I'm ever, ever coming back.



Yessir, that's my baby.